Today was the day he learned the truth about Santa.
We were driving home from school. It was just me and him and Isabella. He says, out of the blue, "Is Santa Clause a myth?" I'll admit. I didn't see it coming. I was completely blindsided. My initial response, "Do you mean, like is he real?" "Some people think he's real, and some people don't," he says. Again, stalling, I ask, "What do you think?" He grins sheepishly. "I don't know. That's why I'm asking." We are about to get out of the car, and I say, "We should talk about this when your Dad gets home." I was put on the spot, not at all prepared. And I wasn't ready!
It scares me. More than it makes me sad. Because he's no longer naive. He's growing up. And things are going to get so much tougher. He is gong to need me to be honest with him. Because someday I will want him to be honest with me.
As we were walking inside, he says, "Please. I'm getting older now and I need you to be honest with me. I want to know the truth."
So I told him that that we can believe whatever we want to do believe about Santa Clause. I told him that I believe that Santa is the spirit of Christmas. That he is the love, hope, and magic that can be found in our hearts.
Then I had him read this letter I had seen many times before on pinterest and around the internet. It explains the whole Santa thing the way I wanted to explain it to him when the time came. It covers everything, including how not to spoil the magic for his siblings. You can read the letter here. I don't know who the original author is of this letter, but it is the best one I have found. There are plenty out there, just google "truth about Santa letter". It sums it up by stating that Santa is "no one single person", and that Santa is "the people who keep the spirit of Christmas alive". I think Jackson was actually happy to know a secret as big as this. I think it made him feel special that I was honest with him and that grown up because he knows something his sister and brother don't. I don't think he was disappointed because I think he suspected it for a long time. I remember last year, after reading "Santa's letter", he said, "that looks like your handwriting, Mommy".
This Christmas will definitely be a little different, and I'm not sure how it's going to go. Every year, on Christmas Eve, we put out cookies and sprinkle "reindeer food" in the yard for his reindeer. We check the "Santa tracker" online. The kids have even gotten special email messages from Santa. Of course, I plan to still do all of this with Jackson. We brought out "Bobby" the Elf this morning. He made his way into the bird cage, and even let Stripey out in the process. Jackson hasn't really asked about him yet, although he stared at me a bit confused when he saw Bobby in the cage. Got to leave some magic for him to wonder about.
My name is Kaci. I am a working mom of 3. Wife to Josh. Mom to Jackson, Cameron & Isabella. My life is dinner, homework, baseball, basketball, grocery lists, laundry, middle school, wine, video games, and schedules. I started this blog because I love taking pictures, and I needed a place to document our life. I wanted a place to write it all down, to remember little details so easily forgotten in the mad rush that is the life of a family of 5. Through my photos and words, I endeavor to capture our story.